Marriage Counseling Orange County Specialists
When a young couple decide to get married, in their vows they swear to always stay faithful. You’ll never hear a newlywed vow to be unfaithful. It is still sometimes shocking to see the sheer volume of couples who find themselves in this exact predicament. When this happens, the marriage is on very shaky ground, and it needs to either be worked out or the marriage will most likely end. If you find yourself in this predicament, it may be time for thinking about Marriage Counseling in Orange County.
Marriage Counseling Orange County: focusing on solutions to everyday problems.
The Orange County marriage counselors listed here are marital/couples counseling experts, dealing with dynamics relating to affairs, stress/anxiety and depression, and assisting individuals in developing healthy coping mechanisms related to past and present difficulties. Each of the Orange County therapists also have their own expertise in a wide range of areas (including children and adolescents). All of the therapists listed have their offices in Orange County, California. It is common for clients to come to their marriage counselors from many surrounding Southern California communities. Many of the marriage counselors listed here offer day and evening appointments.
Marriage Counseling Orange County: offering practical, interactive, solution-focused assistance.
The approach of the therapists listed here is to provide support and usable information to help clients resolve current situations and patterns that may be causing problems. They incorporate a blend of conventional and innovative approaches aimed specifically at providing rapid relief and sustainable improvements. How well these things work will depend on how hard you work. You will not get judged, discounted, or preached at. The services you receive from the marriage counseling Orange County experts listed here, and the concerns you bring, will remain confidential unless you decide to release that information to another party (like an insurance company).
The licensed counselors are very goal oriented and see their role as assisting you to achieve those goals through understanding, education, coaching, and our many years of training and first-hand experience. With sensitivity and compassion, they will strive to build on strengths to achieve the goals you provide them.
Marriage Counseling Orange County: What to Expect
The first visit with your Orange County marriage counselor
In order to keep their rates as low as possible, most marriage counselors do not have full time office staff, therefore when you call them, you will likely get an answering service. If you are a potential new client, you follow the phone prompts. If you are calling for a specific therapist, leave your message in their voice mail box.
Of course there’s the obligatory paperwork, but you can print the forms from the therapist’s website and have them completed when you come in. Each counselor strives to set themselves apart by seeing people on time. If they happen to be behind in their schedule they will step out of our session and let you know. You can expect to be treated with warmth and respect during every visit. The first meeting will be focused on establishing a positive relationship and gathering information about the situations that bring you into the therapist’s office. Marriage counselors believe the stress you are experiencing is significant and many times the clients have a lot at stake. They will not discount your perceptions, but will value them as expert opinions. Each person will have the opportunity to share their thoughts about the situation and its causes. There will be no judgments made or any problems minimized. The counselor will most likely be taking notes while you talk; it‘s just good clinical care. There is nothing magical about what or when writing is done. Marriage Counselors in Orange County see a lot of people and reviewing these notes prior to your next meeting helps them stay current. If there is time toward the end of this first session, you may be asked to outline specific goals you want the therapist to assist you in achieving. Counselors see you as in charge and they are hired help, in the same way you would hire a competent builder to make home improvements. If necessary, they will start the second session with any left-over questions and goal identification. Your goals are flexible and may change as things progress.
Future Visits with your Orange County marriage counselor
Offering you quick resolution and solutions during the first meeting is premature. The job of the Orange County marriage counseling professional will be to help you identify counter-productive patterns and offer support, education, and coaching that will assist in trading in old patterns, that are not working well for you, for patterns that will hopefully bring the relief you’re looking for. However, counseling will not always be an easy process, difficult changes may be necessary, and at times may produce discomfort. Marriage counselors have no particular magic if you do not work hard during and between meetings. Few counselors focus on problems and negatives. Most will utilize a strengths perspective and will frequently begin each meeting with “what’s better since our last meeting?”, and then help you identify the “how” you made it better so that you can repeat the formula. Please come prepared for each meeting. Goal attainment will progress much more efficiently when you arrive with agenda and topics in mind. Licensed couples counselors strive to cover a lot of ground in the solution focused approach and some of it might be forgotten after you leave. Most therapists take notes, so feel free to arrive with your own written concerns and take your own notes for review later.
Whenever the issue of infidelity is brought up, attention needs to be paid to both those who have experienced it multiple times, and also to those who are experiencing it for the first time. This is an incredibly important issue, and that’s how it needs to be treated. If you think about it for a second, what would be your advice to a friend who confided in you about having an unfaithful spouse?
Almost without exception, the advice of seeking out a therapist or psychologist in Orange County for marriage counseling. But at the end of the day, it typically just comes down to the wishes of the couple themselves, and no-one else.
As an Orange County Marriage Counselor, I see two major problems that need to be dealt with as soon as possible. The first is, what caused the infideity? The second is, what can be done to begin putting the marriage back together and stop the cheating. Most of the time, my clients already have an idea about what course of action they are going to take. They are typically looking for some sort of support. If I, as a counselor, supported such a seemingly foregone conclusion, I would be failing my clients.
A huge part of my job as a marriage counselor is to discover a way to help you see your true intent, and to help guide you to see all of the options in front of you before making a decision. Many times acting so quickly upon finding out such devastating news about your spouse ends with a decision that ends up being regretted later on. Often times, the best decision is the one that appears to be the most difficult.
When seeking an Orange County marriage counselor, ask yourself if it would be easier to deal with the cheating if you were 100% positive it would never happen again. When infidelity happens multiple times, that’s even harder to handle. But it doesn’t mean it’s impossible. Far from it. But it IS more difficult. When this is the case one of the few things that can be done is to attempt to find out why it keeps happening.
This is a huge reason why marriage counseling is so important. It is during our time together that we can discover many things you may not have even been aware of. Often, this can help in discovering what the true problem is and making dealing with it a top priority. although the partner committing the infidelity needs support as well, He/She MUST accept responsibility for what has happened. Attempting to point a finger at the one who was cheated on isn’t what will happen during our sessions. Accountability is paramount. Just saying “I’m sorry” without true change will not help in the long run. So when you come to my office, I won’t judge you AT ALL, but I also won’t let you off the hook.
Marriage counseling isn’t about assigning blame. It’s about confronting what has happened, and finding an honest way of moving forward.
If you need the help of an Orange County marriage Counselor, please feel free to call me at (949)612-9890 for a free phone consultation so that we can put together a plan of attack to put in motion the saving of your marriage. If you’re looking experienced, licensed, caring Orange County Marriage Counseling, please consider contacting a professional to help you through this difficult time.